One night, three destructive dreams

First was in some sort of blue-themed 70’s style home that had a few levels but no stairs. The lowest level was a pool. The same lady – a friend – who has featured in other dreams was in this one. (I’d bet a stack of cash she never reads this site. I also texted her about one dream ages ago). In this dream when i was alone I was being pursued by really odd things. 2D, sketched in ink on white and no matter how hard I hit them they never stopped. A male in the dream told me I’d been given a drug to expose deepest thoughts. And there was a huge spider which when I captured under a glass bowl changed into two other creatures which burrowed right out.

Second involved a city, and a building which I and others watched burning.

Third was long long queues of people waiting to play these odd games from a hole-in-the-wall type thing. Lots of such things. I got to play one, and won something but didn’t know how. It made no sense at all.

Again my head has been screwed with for the day. I get little replays of the dream scenes as I did housework.

WTF is my mind doing?

I dislike sleeping

Two nights ago I had another long dream about being unable to navigate around a hotel. The dream never seemed to end, it wore me out. These dreams screw up my following day. I was subdued, did no domestic tasks, just sat with the animals while the TV droned on. I remember thinking that I am so very fed up of hotel dreams.


Last night. In the dream I was leaving work. What that work was is blurred, but I knew that I could never find a pen, so I left work deciding to buy a pen on a lanyard and went into the city. No idea what city, but it was a city. (I have NO idea what shop in my city would sell such a thing).

Each street had a full market going on. Lots of stalls, masses of people, very little room to move, having to follow the stream of people. I had some sort of bag, or backpack, or something that made this movement difficult and slow. It would catch products causing them to fall – so making progress slower – or catch them and take them – so causing me to get stopped which slowed again. These streets went on and on and on. I could not escape, I could not find the pen I wanted.
Then something happened – no idea what, could have been Zelda adjusting position next to me – and my mind started saying “It’s a dream, it’s a dream, it’s a dream”. I woke up. Got up, went downstairs to get a drink of water.

Back to bed, back to sleep and right into another fantastical dream in some sort of flying object with targets to reach, targets to hit, being pursued. Just as the chasers closed in I woke.

Again my mind has been screwed for the day. It’s like a bad hangover.

I wish I could stop dreaming.

Pic unrelated

Two nights, four dreams

I’m in a room somewhere, no idea where. Jacqui is in the room. I don’t see her, I don’t even hear her, but she’s there. There are various items laid out on the floor. Not big, bulky stuff. I know that I can take what I want and leave the room but whatever I leave will disappear. I cannot remember what the items were but I did not leave the room.

Two. (Same night)
I’m inside a huge hotel and inside a lift. I need to get to the 4th floor but there is no button for it. There is 4b / 4c / 4d but no 4.
Then I’m outside at the base of large mountains which the hotel is built into and onto. I, with others including one person I know, am in a hanging monorail gondola which can swing from side to side. It accelerates up the rail – and sometimes without a rail – swinging from left to right, swooping up and down. I can see the mountainsides, the flora, the rocks, the room windows, balconies. We got into the clouds.

The monorail switches to a cart, like a rollercoaster thing, but it’s more elaborate, coloruful, decorated with feathers and lights. It begins the descent, shooting around and through the mountain, around and through the hotel. The scenery changes like it’s a film. Underwater, in space, through clouds, through neon tunnels. There’s lots of music. Sometimes the rails for this too disappear, sometimes the cart changes shape and becomes enclosed, then open. The person I know is now sitting next to me. The ride goes on and on and it is wonderful.
Then it ends at the bottom and I go looking for the exit. I cannot find it. No-one else is looking though. I keep looking. Eventually the following ride ends and releases it’s passengers. They all walk directly to an exit I couldn’t see.

Three. (Next night)
I’m in a place and time that is focused around an event. The event is vague, I can’t see what it’s all about but then suddenly these shapeless colorful entities start floating toward us all, through people, through buildings. Whatever they touch turns grey and disappears. I run but I’m caught. I get transported to another place and time that is praising the consequences of the event and that changes to yet another event. The only one I remember – there were several – is one where the event was about someone ‘ordinary’ yet the immediate followup celebrated their life and accomplishments. The entities happened again but each time I became less scared and walked toward them.

Four. (Same night)
I’m in a hospital. Someone is attacking me. They have a large knife and I know they want to kill me. I’m yelling for help but the nurse who sees me ignores the situation. Students there ignore it. I keep fighting and pleading for help while punching and kicking the attacker. Even when I run from room to room I get no help. Eventually someone does see me, does call 999 and the person is subdued.

It’s weird inside my head at night.

A recurring bad dream

About once every 10 days I have a bad dream where the locations change but the problem is always the same. I am lost.

I am wearing a coat, I have bags, I have a suitcase and I’m trying to get to my room. I’m not at home though. Last night I was in some massive hotel in a country that did not have English as even a second language. I knew my room number – 25 – but I had no clue how to get there. The hotel was complex with malls, bars, many many corridors, many floors, many odd lifts, signs I could not understand. Previously I’ve been in a huge holiday complex, in a city, in blocks of flats, in a university.
I never get to where I need to go. I walk and I walk and I ask and I try many routes but I never get closer. I just get more and more tired and confused.
And every morning after these dreams I wake up with a headache, feel sick and feel absolutely drained. I want to stay in bed and sleep but if I do that the dream carries on from where it left, so I have to get up.

I suppose it’s my mind trying to make sense of where I am in the world. I am lost in many ways without Jacqui and I have no-one to talk to. Despite 4 different health agencies being involved in her care not one asked me about bereavement counselling, I have since asked and been told No, to call Cruse (and they are permanently engaged on the phone). I think I know why they have said No, but I’m not writing that here.

I hate these dreams though because they plague the following day too, and I have no way of stopping them.

I want

to go to Spain, or Portugal or Italy for 2 weeks. No internet. Just cafes, bars and eateries. No TV, maybe a newspaper. Maybe no laptop though playing Infocom would be nice. Books. Newspapers, crosswords, coffee, chatting but lots of silence too. Lots of sleep. For things to slow, be calm, relaxed. A rest. 3 weeks even. This would be very very good. Won’t happen, but it would be good.