The Lizard and Liar Show

Facebook will allow UK election candidates to run false ads

The policy is being championed by Facebook executive Nick Clegg, the former deputy prime minister of the United Kingdom who himself once complained about “lies” spread during the 2016 Brexit referendum.

Nick Clegg – the man that lied to students to get their vote and then fucked them all over with increased University fees.

Trump, Zuckerberg – is there a lack of snipers in the USA? Does no-one want everlasting infamy and a Wikipedia page about themselves?

Eating alone

Widows on the Pain of Dining Alone

I’ve not made a proper cooked meal since Jacqui died.
The oven has been used maybe 4 times for a frozen pizza
The rest of the double range machine has not been used
The air fryer once for home made falafel
The slow cooker, maybe once a week I’ll chop some onions, mushrooms, throw in a tin of beans and make it warm.

The dining table is dismantled.

Tesco keeps a list for you of what you have bought online over the last year so in 5 or so weeks all the food I used to buy for Jacqui will drop away.

I loved cooking, cooking for the family. When the kids were at home we always ate at 6pm watching The Simpsons, or Hollyoaks. I loved cooking food that Jacqui wanted. Now though there’s no point. I don’t do takeaways, I don’t order food at the pub. I live on hummus, coleslaw and tortilla wraps. Maybe rice cakes. Easy, no fuss, little prep or washing up.

In many ways it is easier for me as life transitioned slowly from 4 to 3 to 2 and I knew she would go. It must be so much harder when it comes out of the blue. The effect is the same though – what was a pleasure, what was a good time of day turns into an empty experience every single day.

Jack Dorsey is a slimeball

Register at twitter
I opted to use Email. Note that it says “instead”.

I verified

Then I logged in, clicked around seeing what different icons did.

I did nothing suspicious. My computer did nothing suspicious.
This is Jack Dorsey being a total slimeball by initially saying “You can use email” and then denying you access unless you give him your phone number.

Scummy tactic.

Going off the rails

I think about 2 or 3 years ago I started feeling unwell. Then really unwell. Then terrible. I hurt, ached, just wanted to curl up and sleep. It came on as “just a shitty day” and given back then the stress in my life was high I did not connect how I was feeling physically with anything else.
Prior to this I was in a bad time mentally and I had been prescribed a drug I had not been on before. I knew about it, had read about it and was happy to be on it.
I had no clue at all what else it might do. Rare, but documented.
Anyway, two visits to the doctor and on the second one he does some tests and “Go Directly to Hospital, Do Not Pass Go, Do Not Collect $200”. Off I went and yay, the “head med” has given me a lifelong physical illness.
I stopped that med, the illness abated and I just got on with life.

A couple of months ago my head went to places that were dangerous. Unsafe. I was prescribed – with my consent and understanding – another drug. Mentally it has helped me. Very much so. I love that effect.
Then I started feeling not right. Not ill ill, just not right.

The main effect has been what I now know is Burning Mouth Syndrome. I have bottles of various hot sauces in the fridge / cupboards. Mr Singh’s, Matt’s Hot Sauce (no, not that, Sriracha and more. I LOVE hot spices. Anything sold is stores as “spicy” is meh. Plain. Boring. Tasteless. But what I have now, and have done for a few weeks? They hurt. Actual physical pain. The only thing that does not hurt is room temp milk. Even drinking cold water hurts. Right now as I type this I’ve not had anything to eat/drink for some 20 mins but my mouth hurts.
Then I started to feel pretty crap. Every system in my body is affected in some way and that’s no exaggeration. And yet I couldn’t see why because I was not looking. I just felt like shitonastick.

Either in my dreams this morning, or in that weird ‘surfacing from dreams to the morning’ time my brain connected the giant dots which I just could not see.

Get in to see the GP. Relate history and current events and hey, guess where I get sent?
So I’m back there tomorrow.

I know the cure – stop the head meds.

Physically I will recover, I will ‘feel’ better.

Mentally .. my head will go back to where it should not be. To where I do not want it to be.


Very fucking annoying.

and sad too.

Happy to stop using Fitbit

I’ve several fitbit devices – the clip-on, Flex, Charge, Charge 2, Charge 3, Surge and was until very recently looking to buy a Versa 2. I like them, I like the focus and on some days it did motivate me to get to 10k steps. The Charge 3 was easily my favourite – the perfect size, display and functions.

The Versa 2 comes in at over £200, so when I was in the Apple store recently and say the Series 3 watch was £199 I was suddenly interested. I’ve dumped the Samsung S8+ I was using for an iPhone 11, bought an iPad so the Apple watch made sense. It does everything the fitbit did and more and it does it better. It’s a neat device.

Why dump the S8+? Two reasons, in order: (1) the camera placement right next to the fingerprint sensor is a really really stupid design. I’ve been unable to take a ton of pics because the lens would be blurry and (2) Google.

The fitbits. I’ll never use them again. Ever. Partly because the Apple watch does more – and better – and partly because I’ve stopped really caring about 10k steps. But now I’ve an even better reason – Google again. It looks like Alphabet – effectively Google – will be buying it.

Yeah, like Google having even more of my data would be a good idea.

Places I’ve been

I have Earthdesk as my desktop on the PC. (I have the default wallpaper on the MacBook as I never really see it due to the ‘work’ thing).

Apart from the moon, sun, the ISS (the yellow circle with the dot in it) and storm names which appear anyway, I’ve added dots to the places I’ve been.
Orange – family
Purple – Automattic

(click for big)

They bring back good memories.

Suicide is selfish

Few nights ago a guy in the pub was banging on and on about how he was late for something that day. The reason? A woman had stepped off a bridge and died when she hit the motorway below.

This guy really did mean what he said – that she was a selfish bitch, a bitch who gave no thought to others, a selfish bitch who was all me me me.

I did think about talking to him, trying to get him to see her differently but … sometimes you know a lost cause when you see/hear it, right? All I can do is ignore him going forward.

Post title? Suicide is NOT selfish.

Not at all.

Check the video, please?