Jacqui is completing an application form at the moment – what for does not matter here – and there are a variety of questions along the lines of “If you had a million pounds what would you do” and “If you could invite 3 other people for a meal who would they be and why” – that sort of thing. It’s all good stuff and she has asked me a couple as I wander through to get a drink. Today’s was interesting.
“One half of the world cannot understand the pleasures of the other.”
She asked me who I would be if I could be anyone for 24 hours. I said a woman. She said Who and I replied it wouldn’t matter. We’ve done this conversation many times so it was surprising that she didn’t see that answer before she asked the question. Anyway, she persisted and I did think. It’s pretty difficult. If you are going to do something for 24 hours then you want to get something out of it. So being Bill Gates or Richard Branson is going to teach you nothing just like being The Queen, or Prime Minister. There is nothing from there you could bring back after that time which would benefit you, be of practical or even theoretical use. Money you could spend in a day but power? In a day? With all the red tape and nonsense layers protecting us from the whims of them? Wouldn’t happen. In the end I said I would be her for a day. Not because I want to know what it’s like to be married to me (I really do not want to know how I am from that perspective) but because I want to know what it’s like to be her.
Years ago I rang Jacqui at work said “What does this mean” and help the phone closer to one of the girls who was crying. I knew she knew that one cry meant hungry, one was tired, one was nappy. But I’d done those 3 so I rang her. She didn’t know but the point is back then she had the routine down with the child care. So she got the house done, the sprog fed/watered/clean, had her own time and it was all organised. I had none. So I wanted to be like her. Organised. In the end I got there but I was never as good but I knew I could be there. With J’s MS though I cannot be there. I know some of what it’s done but I don’t know all of it, can’t do because it’s so physical. Had to buy some washing up gloves. Not because the water is too hot but because she cannot feel heat, has no clue how hot water is. Been like that for a while but until I mentioned the water she didn’t think to tell me. So I’d be her. That way I would know just for a day how hard (or easy, no pulling the wool after that day)(yes, I know it’s actually not easy) it is, how much she could and could not feel, all the physical effects. Not that 24 hours would give a clue what 24/7/365 is like but a brief glimpse would be good. Of course it may be a very bad thing too. (This answer won me some brownie points too.)
Same for any partnership though?