A couple of months ago I blogged that I had been successful in applying for a place on a teacher training course. I’ve been trying to get into teaching for a few years because it was something I really enjoyed as a nurse and in general. Because of when I took exams and when I did my nurse training convincing educational authorities to let me in without having to do additional pre-training was always fruitless. But things change, goalposts are moved and like I said, I was offered a place for a course starting next month. And then something else happened – I started work for Automattic.
So I was left in a position where I could almost choose:
– Teaching. Always wanted to do it. Decent salary from where I was looking from. I’d not actually done it though. I would not be in control. Long hours.
– Automattic. I keep doing what I enjoy doing. I control work conditions. Hours would still be long.
There are more factors but I think they are the main ones.
A lot of thinking has been done. It was resolved ages ago because it had to be, because I needed to know where to focus my energies and because sometimes only deciding something and deciding to live with that decision makes you face up to what is actually in that decision. Dithering around helps no-one. It’s no surprise probably that Automattic won.
1. I really do enjoy doing what I do. Sure I have some requests / feedback that make me wail – and that’s the case right now which is why I’m taking 5 to blog – but overall I love what I do. I know I’m good at it and that I’m delivering a good service.
2. Because I set my hours I have the flexibility I need when J has a relapse. No training or traditional employer would tolerate that need and I doubt I would if I were in their shoes.
3. Automattic and what I do is a known quantity. I know what I am doing, there are no surprises involved and that helps keep things on an even keel. Teaching = stress.
I could still do the training next year, or after that and I know at times I’ll wonder about what could have been because being a Teacher probably offers me more security in various ways, but then it isn’t doable just yet, it may never be doable and possibly I’m just a little tormented by the closeness of the dream I’ve had. Heh.. I just wrote I could do the training next year. That’s not going to happen is it? Hardly likely J will make a miraculous recovery. That sounds like it’s after sympathy – it’s not. It’s just a statement of fact. (Which sounds the same. Bah)
I’m not unhappy to have made the choice I did. In fact last week in San Franscisco just confirmed absolutely that my decision was the correct one and I am very happy with everything involved with what I do. It means that I can now focus not only on Automattic but also in expanding other online interests I have – nothing big, nothing that will ever make me pots of cash but it’ll buy the odd thing every once in a while (I’m hoping it’ll buy more of course!). So teaching will not be – their loss, wordpress.com’s gain :)