The Rape survey

BBC

A third of people believe a woman is partially or completely responsible for being raped if she has behaved flirtatiously

So a woman decides to dress how she likes (this is a country where that is allowed), she behaves in a manner that she feels in suitable for the situation (and why not), she talks to whoever she wishes (that’s allowed too) and yet when she gets raped it’s HER fault ? How does that work then ? If she has behaved in a way that as a society we find acceptable, why is it her fault when a man decides to use fear and his physical strength to violate her body ? And even if she is behaving in a way that you, me and society does find unacceptable, what right does that give a man to physically and psychologically damage a woman ? There is no excuse for a woman being raped. NONE.
If a woman is raped, it is because a man lost control.
If a woman is raped, it is because a man wishes to dominate a woman.
If a woman is raped, it is because a man does not respect women.
If a woman is raped, it is not her fault. It’s as simple as that.

And if a woman is raped, she should be believed.

But we all know that the ‘third’ referred to above would soon change their minds if someone close to them was raped don’t we ?

And what this country really needs to more females in the highest judicial positions to remove the male bias that women have to endure.

13 thoughts on “The Rape survey

  1. Totally agreed. Sure a woman could have been acting provocatively.. but as soon as she says no there is a line. I’m some scum decides to cross that line then it is NOT her fault.

    however…

    if a woman is raped, she should be believed.

    I don’t know if unconditional belief is ever a good thing. However she at least should never be treated with scepticism (unless there is a damn good reason.

  2. if a woman is raped, she should be believed.

    I disagree with Mark and agree with Gregory. There are so many women who lie and say they were raped because the guy didn’t call back or they were drunk or something, you can’t unconditionally believe them. Even if a rapekit comes back positive for sex, that still doesn’t mean rape.

  3. Agreed. But blanket acceptance is just as dangerous, for both sides.

    Also the reason the figures are so low is often to do with the fact that it is their word against the mans. If you say “she must be believed” then the man is automatically guilty.

    That isn’t justice. There must be proof, t beyond reasonable doubt. The alternative is to change the fundemental way justice works. I wouldn’t want to live in a country that didn’t understand the “innocent until proven guilty” axiom.

    I agree though, that is a horrible, horrible statistic. I have friends who have been through this process (to greater or lesser justice), and I wouldn’t wish it on anyone. But, like the death penalty, I don’t think what you are suggesting is a real solution. It’s just a broken addition to a broken system. The system needs fixing, so lets fix that!

  4. I’m not saying that the word of the woman outweighs everything.

    Look at the numbers. I’d guess that the 6% is actually too high given that rape is a crime that does go unreported. So if crimes are going unreported, the question has to be “Why ?” and the underlying factor MUST be that the woman feels she will not be believed. It is perfectly possible for someone to be believed and for justice to still happen is it not ?

    The scales of justice are tipped too much in the favour of the man. I’m just saying things need evening out.

  5. Actually I’d say the unreported part comes mostly from shame, horror, and associated feelings. Many women who DO report it are finally pushed into it by people who they have told. This is also one reason why there aren’t as many convictions: lack of evidence.

    By the point the charge is made in many cases the woman has had a shower (which you’d expect, but is the exact wrong thing to do), or it can have been days or weeks since the incident.

    Yes there needs to be change, but I’m not sure how justified saying the scales are tipped in favour is. The scales are tipped towards the man because it is assumed he is innocent. Unless there is proof they can’t be found guilty.

    However there needs to be greater awareness of the correct thing to do. The fact that it is not the woman that should feel shame, but the man. The correct things to do. We all know these when it comes to many other serious crimes. It might be that the woman feels that she will not be believed, but is that a fact in the courts? I don’t think so, unless you call ‘innocent until proven guilty’ disbelief. However it might be a factor with the people around her or, concidering the survey, society at large.

    There needs to be social changes. Not legal ones. It’s a horrible thing and people need education, not legislation.

  6. Stumbled over this link with a search phrase that had nothing to do with it. I noticed the tag was the BBC, so I’m speaking from the states, and as a rape survior.

    My question is simple. What age is the “woman” based on this survey?

    I think that really needs to be sited, clearly, to get a clear view on the “results”. Does a 11 year old girl act in a way that deserves rape? Does an 80 year old woman act in the same way? That’s the problem with survey and statistic.

  7. after I was raped 2yrs ago by two complete strangers I learnt first hand that you are made to feel like fool and an idiot if you ever report the rape to Queensland police they don’t and won’t believe you the person who is reporting. You are RAPED again by the people that are supposedly trained to help and protect you when your are wounded and exposed, not in the physical sense but in the emotional sense. There is NO SUPPORT of another woman in the room crowed with men, you are alone in a terrifying place. I am getting my life back together but no thanks to Police – Hospital out side of my small support group. Woman don’t report RAPE because you must prove it happen and your judged guilty from the moment you set foot on their door step more often than not. More so when you can not give the police a open and shut case with no effort on their part. I pray that this will change over time but I can’t see happening in the near future.

  8. I certainly know that feeling. When I reported a “date rape,” the cops were so kind to me that evening, then a detective got involved and came to my home to talk to me. He seemd like he was also, 100% on my side, until he talked to my attacker. He then made me feel like a fool, and said I may as well drop the case because I didn’t have a leg to stand on.” My raper did not deny that we had sex, the problem was consensual vs. nonconsensual, which is so hard to prove.

  9. Well, if you were raped, you must be able to prove it as with any other crime. It’s better to leave a rapist free on the streets than imprisoning an innocent man. No innocent man should be behind bars and many are, probably lots of them. A rapist as well as any other criminal is not actually guilty. They just have problems, they were born with them or society made them like that. I mean, if you’re born with mental retardation, should you be punished for your actions?? It’s the same with rapists and all criminals. Jails only exist because society does not yet know how to “fix” people so everyone behaves according to society’s rules. Yes, we have gone to the moon, we have invented powerful bombs and we have destroyed entire countries with armies using the most advanced technologies BUT we haven’t solved the real social problems in the world. Capitalist governments aren’t interested in fixing social problems, finding the cure for terrible diseases, nor finding the cure for crime. Capitalist governments are only interested in power and money. The day the world embraces a pure and uncorrupted form of socialism that hasn’t yet existed, there will be real human progress in all areas and you won’t have to worry about getting raped.

  10. “There are so many women who lie and say they were raped because the guy didn’t call back or they were drunk or something, you can’t unconditionally believe them.”
    The stats for false rape accusations are 2-3%. That means that out of 100 allegations made, 2-3 are false, but MORE IMPORTANTLY, 97-98 are legitimate. Wouldn’t you agree that accusing “so many women who lie” may seem unfair for so many more women who don’t?

    “‘6% of rape accusations end with a conviction.’ If 100 women ARE raped, only SIX men will get punished.”
    Reported rapes are a small fraction of actual occurrences, so the number of men who do pay the price is far, far less.

    There’s a variety of reasons why women (and men) don’t report rape. Shame and guilt of being in that situation tend to cloud one’s recognition of rape. Some victims simply didn’t even know the violation against them was rape. Just because we’re adults doesn’t mean we can automatically define boundaries, especially when the boundaries are so socially contentious.

    Perhaps the worst part about being raped is facing the people who interrogate the victim as if he/she should have had full control of the situation.

    First, rape is not easy to prove like other crimes because it is not always violent. Second, social expectations of women’s behaviour already cloud objective judgment of the crime committed against her. Third, since most evidence submitted in these cases is circumstantial (even forensic evidence can be cirumstantial), it sadly comes down to he-said-she-said scenario.

    Right on, Gregory! When it comes down to it, the correct thing to do is RESPECT. Learn to respect people’s sexual boundaries, learn to respect their dignity. People should reflect upon their feelings about rape as if it were their wives, daughters, or girlfriends having their sexual rights violated. Educate yourselves and people you care about respectful relationships, and perhaps one day we won’t be having this debate about blaming the victim.

    “It’s better to leave a rapist free on the streets than imprisoning an innocent man.” You need help.

  11. Women should be believed but it is understandable when they are not. There have been so many storeys out there talking about how such a women claimed she was raped , when yes claimed is all it is – she crys wolf because of some reason or another.

    There those women out there who claim they are raped when they actually weren’t because they didn’t let the male know they didn’t want sex. they didn’t do anything to let them know in anyway, and I mean anything, just let it happen –

    There are those women out there who dress sexy on a night out and yes that is when they don’t get believed. i can understand that but

    Every woman should be believed but you have to hear the other side f the story. You have to hear both sides. Always for otherwise

    all women are gonna start being believed and there so many innocent man out there who get thrown in jail –

    you HAVE to hear BOTH sides…not just one.

    But then there are the times when you can only hear the woman’s side – the only way to know for a fact if they are lying or not – is how they start acting, how they start treating people, how they start thinking and mental wise –

    Seems a bit harsh to say but it will affect you no matter what…and always will..no matter what…in one form or another…

    why people dont believe women when this is claimed is because it has happened alot of the time when things hav been made up. not just rape but other things.

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