Wierd .. the meds change is kicking in. Very odd …. removing one med slowly. “Head meds” are strange – from my experience anyway – in that when you add them, then take them away they never leave what they affected untouched. That make sense to you ? So I’m changing back to a mental state I was in some months ago yet my path there is not the same path that got me there and when I get there I will again not be the same.
Back when I was a nurse, there was a large change in medications prescribed to the clients across the hospital. This was due to a number of reasons; old meds had been superceded, new meds were promised to be cheaper (they lied) and side-effects were fewer (but nastier .. they never said much about that) and as part of this huge change over, I had to read a lot. More than one significant study showed that people who had taken certain neuroleptic meds for a period of time still had that chemical present in the blood many many many months after it was stopped. It had dissolved into and been retained by various body tissues, leeching back out incredibly slowly. So when my psych says to stop taking the tablet, it does not mean that I will not be affected by it any longer.
Looking at the longer term to now, arguably I am what I was + the concoction I have taken in. This arguably renders any future interventions as tainted does it not ?
Had to buy some gloves for the gym today. Yesterday my grip while working out wasn’t great due to sweating and doing a bench press type move over my head the barbell did not feel safe so gloves it is.