All Landlords Are Bastards

Repeat after me: All Landlords Are Bastards.
For want of a pressed metal lock that – if I could find one – costs less than 5 quid, they will withhold £100 of the bond. All Landlords Are Bastards. No way could we find one today, any hardware shops will be closed tomorrow (the large shops don’t do this lock) and tomorrow they want the house back. Until I hand the keys over, I am the tenant. Once I hand the keys over, anything I do will be criminal damage. I could cheerfully cause well over that amount of damage.

Update: J has agreed a trade with him. He gives us the money, we give him the keys. He’s not keen on the idea but who cares ? :)

11 thoughts on “All Landlords Are Bastards

  1. (root): here (or at least all the leases I’ve ever signed – in the states) they specifically say that you can’t put your security deposit to the last month’s rent. Actually, they say lots of things that make you want to run and set up house in a tree somewhere. Good trees are hard to come by though, so most of us sign the horrifying little contracts.

  2. I want to be a landlord when I grow up so I can be a bastard too!

    My Bastard Landlord story:
    I was moving out. Half my shit was there, half my shit was out. The place, as one could expect, was turned upside down. I still have a week until I turned the keys in, went to the apartment to get more stuff and had a little note stuck to my door.

    Jennifer,
    I took the liberty of looking around the apartment today. To my surprise the place is filthy. I expect the trash to be gone by the first.
    Signed,
    Bastard Landlord

    I also noticed this day he stuck a big George Bush sign in my yard. So while cleaning up the trash, that went too :)

    I was just amazed at this letter. I lived there for six freaking years and never once gave him a problem. Of course the place was a mess, I was in the middle of moving. I did decide to be the better woman and clean the place before I moved completely out.

    :love:

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